Friday, May 31, 2013

It's official...

I'm going to be doing hard time. I'm going to the slammer!

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Since I can't be trusted outside, Mommy and Daddy have decided I need a fenced in area.

But they got the wrong puppy see! It wasn't me I tell ya! I was framed by a no good, dirty, double crosser!
Too dramatic?

Now I'll have to get "MOM" tattooed on my leg.

I also need to get my paws on a spoon and a papier-mâché head.

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Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Separation anxiety?? Me??


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As long as Mommy never ever leaves the house, I'm fine.

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So, what's the rub?

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Saturday, May 25, 2013

Have a terrific Memorial Day weekend, everyone!!!

Remember to proudly fly your American flag!
Like me!

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Hey! What's all that writing on my side?!

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Wednesday, May 22, 2013

It was a little scary around here.

All of the sudden it got really dark!!

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Then the angels started bowling in Heaven again.
They must have had a tournament because it was non stop strikes!!

I wonder if they wear matching shirts?

I think they have a Disco ball up there too.

Anyway, this is pretty much how I spent my time during the scary storm.

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Tuesday, May 21, 2013

♫ Sunshine on my shoulders ♪

♬ makes me sunburn. ♪

♫ Sunshine in my eyes can make me blind. ♪

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Sorry, Mr. John Denver.
I like my lyrics better.


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Sunday, May 19, 2013

Sorry I haven't posted in a few days.

We've been busy playing all weekend with our nubby blobs!!!

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But Mommy's been stressed all weekend.

Daddy called the vet's office on Friday to schedule something for me called a "spay."
I guess it's something I'm supposed to have when I turn 6 months old. Did you know I turn 6 months old in a few days?! It's true!

Well anyway, the vet lady today Daddy they are booked until the end of June. I'd have to wait another month.
That means I could go into something called "heat."

I'm not sure what that means. But with summer right around the corner, I'd rather go into "air conditioning."

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Maybe the vet lady can give me a fan too.

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Thursday, May 16, 2013

I used to be knee high to a grasshopper.

Not anymore. I'm a big girl!
I'm as big as my sister Darla was full grown and I'm only 6 months old!

Besides my love for eating, I love to look out the window and watch the nice lady with the big Labrador walk by my house every morning.
I'm still not tall enough to see them out of one of the living room windows though.

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But thank goodness this is a crooked, 155 year old farmhouse! All I have to do is walk over to the window on the other side of the room and I can see them!
YaY for old, slanted floorboards!

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"Hi nice lady and Lab!! If I didn't eat absolutely everything on the ground and barf it up during the night making Mommy clean it up and having to wash my blankies at 3am, she would let me outside to play more often.
See ya!"

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Sunday, May 12, 2013

How did you spend your Mothers Day?

We spent ours making a loud racket all day.

We spent it barking at each other, chasing each other, squeaking our toys, biting each other, then barking at each other again, chasing each other again, squeaking our toys again and biting each other again.

Then we napped for about 20 minutes. Then started it all over again.

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Oh and we got Mommy a big bottle of Advil for the headache she had all day.

She was very happy with our gift.

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Saturday, May 11, 2013

Last night I had my first experience with...

I didn't like it much.

Mommy told me when she was little her Daddy explained that it's the sound that comes after lightning. (It has something to do with electrostatic discharge.)

C'mon now. Would you fall for that one?

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Everyone knows it's angels bowling in Heaven.

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Thursday, May 9, 2013

When I grow up...

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I either want to go into vacuum cleaner repair or be an electrician.
Maybe both.

I haven't decided yet.

I'll have to sleep on it.

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Don't tell Mommy I've been "practicing" on her vacuum.

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Tuesday, May 7, 2013

See. I'm wearing my new harness.

Now that I'm bigger it fits me better.
It's red and mesh.

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Kind of looks like a tank top from the 1970's.
Something David Starsky would have worn back in the day.
Actually, it's soft and quite comfortable. I don't mind it at all.

But I still do not like that leash! I try to run and I can't! So I just stand there. Even when Mommy tugs.

Nope. I refuse to move. So she has to pick me up and carry me back in the house.

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Maybe Mommy needs to provide me with a Candy Apple Red/White Stripe Gran Torino.

If she did, I might consider wearing a belted cardigan sweater.

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Monday, May 6, 2013


Get Ready To Rummmmmbllllllllle!!!

Ha! Ha!!! I've got a death grip on my orange, nubby squeaky blob!! No one will ever take it from me!!
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I said, NO ONE!!
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Uh-oh... What's Gracie doing over there????!!!
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Back off, blondie!!!
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The winner and still world champion of the orange, nubby squeaky blob....
**The crowd cheers**
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Don't I get a belt or something??

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Saturday, May 4, 2013

Today I ate...

two live carpenter ants, four live Asian Beetles, one live yellow jacket hornet and a couple of rabbit turds.
I also tore apart one of Mommy's art sponges, chewed on some muslin and peed on the area rug in the upstairs hallway.

So overall, I've had a pretty productive day.
Time for a nap.

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Friday, May 3, 2013

I have an obsession with chewing...

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Mommy's hoodie drawstrings.
(when she's wearing one)

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I also enjoy chewing shoelaces.
Mommy has to admit, it's better than me chewing furniture legs.

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Have a great weekend, everyone!!
I plan on playing outside without my leash and making Mommy and Daddy a nervous wreck.
Gotta keep them on their toes!

See ya!

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Thursday, May 2, 2013

This morning I woke Mommy up at 4:30am

She thought I had to go to the bathroom.

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I woke her up...

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because I was...

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She falls for it EVERY time too!

Next, I've got a bridge I want to sell her.

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